Thursday, September 17, 2009

KU hoops players to sign autographs


Kansas University’s men’s basketball players will sign autographs at 10 a.m. Saturday at the HyVee Hawk zone on the west side of Anderson Family Football Complex at Memorial Stadium. KU’s football team will meet Duke in an 11 a.m. kickoff.


overseashawk 10 years, 4 months ago

I'm 4031 miles away so that's basically 57.5 hours driving if I were to do 70 miles an hour continuously. OR, I could fly and make it there in about 20 hours (including layovers) if I were to drive straight from KCI to Lawrence.

I think that the "Jayhawk nation" is international!!

ROCK CHALK!!!!!!!!

eaglemike 10 years, 4 months ago

Hey is this a contest to see who's the farthest away? I'm not real sure how far I am, but my plane ticket said I traveled 11,799 miles to get here.........and that's from Houston, so I guess it would be a bit over 12,000 miles away. So yeah, I'd definitely say the world loves the Jayhawks.

Martin Rosenblum 10 years, 4 months ago


Youve got to find a new travel agent!

Good news is the freq. flyer miles you're racking up!

KUFan90 10 years, 4 months ago

Given that the earth's circumference is only 24,900 I say it will be tough to beat eaglemike.

Martin Rosenblum 10 years, 4 months ago

I thought eaglemike meant his plane ticket from Houston to Lawrence said he had gone 11,799 miles. Isn't that what it sounded like?

I was trying to figure out how many connections he had made!

KANSTUCKY 10 years, 4 months ago

No wonder the airlines are going bankrupt.

Tony Bandle 10 years, 4 months ago

I'll be 200 yards...but it will be uphill!!!!!

Mark Winter 10 years, 4 months ago

146 miles to KU football game- 2 tickets & gas $150.

146 miles to KU basketball game- 2 tickets & gas $140.

146 miles to Lawrence - never too far

Being a JAYHAWK- priceless.

jaybate 10 years, 4 months ago

jaybate news service:

Bulletin: Lexington, CY--University of Contucky players will assemble at 3:00 p.m. today outside the team's new Phyllis Georgette and Hiram Sleepwalker Athletic Dormitory--a combination video arcade, chicken ranch, and athletic dorm that also houses the administrative offices of the new Rick Pitino Institute for the Study of College Basketball Coach Sexuality. Fans are cordially invited to meet the players and receive autographs.

Bulletin Update: Lexington, CY--Officials of the University of Contucky just announced the autograph signing portion of today's "Meet the Players" event has been postponed until all members of the team are able to sign their names. When asked about how the players could take and pass their SATs, when they were unable to sign their own names, Coach Conapari said, "There have been no allegations against me regarding this issue, and I have credit card receipts documenting that I was out on the road recruiting each and every day that any of my players were reputedly taking SATs. I have no further comment other than to say that I intend for any banners we hang while I am Contucky to remain hanging Contucky at least until after my retirement, which I hope will be long, long in the future, but understand that it could be as soon as next month. I love Contucky and feel blessed and at home here."

Tony Bandle 10 years, 4 months ago

from the "Totally Off The Subject File", did Pal Cal ever follow-thru on that idea of having the first BBall scrimmage from the fifty yard line of their footbaqll stadium?

Frankly, I thought it was a brilliant long as it didn't rain, didn't violate some obscure NCAA rule, didn't hurt the playing field, didn't inconvenience the football squad, didn't........maybe I just answered my own question!

James Miller 10 years, 4 months ago

I don't know how how far away from Lawrence Iraq is, but I love the Jayhawks!!! Rock Chalk

Chris Shaw 10 years, 4 months ago

I'm only 16 hours away in North Carolina, but because I am in the dreaded Tar Heel state I think I should at least add 30 hours to my time for an overall total of 46 hours.

jaybate 10 years, 4 months ago


You need to get a t-shirt made that reads "University of Kansas-Chapel Hill" with pictures of Dean, Roy, and all of Roy's staffers from KU. :-)

jaybate 10 years, 4 months ago

I'm not saying I'm far from Lawrence, but the distance on Google Maps is given in parsecs.

Martin Rosenblum 10 years, 4 months ago

jaybate -

Then you must be in a galaxy far, far away, right?

My suspicions confirmed! Your super-human verbosity and highly evolved knowledge of all things worldly can only come from an E.T. such as yourself.

How is the BBQ in your world? We've never heard you speak of your local favs.

jaybate 10 years, 4 months ago


My current location favors alderwood smoked barbecue. Very poor, IMHO. But I am still relatively new here and so cannot claim to have given all cue here a fair sample. Regardless, early returns indicate a most unfortunate emphasis on sweet sauces running even to an apricot barbecue sauce. Nothing at all to recommend for barbecue and at times an intense reason to move from an otherwise pleasant region. I have contemplated starting a cue, but am not convinced enough communal reservoir of soul exists to justify it.

jaybate 10 years, 4 months ago

Friday without Hope for Seeing a KU Basketball Game on TV this Weekend and so Dealing with it All Through the Artifice of Primes:

} Michael Jordan Prime has entered the new Hilary Clinton Prime Personality Rehabilitation Center in Little Rock, Arkansas. Treatment involves first going through controlled hype withdrawal, then facing an intervention of those who respect you that you have unecessarily dissed, and then doing 200 hours of community service. Jordan Prime is reportedly doing well.

} Sherron "Sherronatron" Collins Prime has been invited to participate in yet another test of quantum theory at Fermi Labs, where scientists will attempt to measure both speed and location of Sherronatron on the dribble to verify that the act of observation alters measured outcome, even with large masses moving at atomic speeds.

} Ben Howland Prime announced today that it is official--he missed his best chance at a ring after getting to the Final Four three straight years and not winning the big one. Dean Smith Prime and Roy Williams Prime have reputedly called him to tell him to push on, that life goes on after these sorts of set backs and that he too can win one eventually. There is no word whether Roy Prime suggested that Ben Prime negotiate another job during his next Final Four appearance, leave to replace one of his former players as head coach at another school, and take the players his former player had recruited to try to rebuild the program and win a ring with those guys, or not.

} Jeff Bzdelik Prime's campaign to rejuvenate the Colorado Buffalo program is nearing failure. At his most recent press conference, not only did no media from the state of Colorado attend, CUAD spokesperson and Assistant Athletic Director in Charge of Controlled Substances, Ms. Ima Still-High Prime, failed to pronounce the coach's name correctly during an introduction to an empty room. She said, "Wow, here's Heffie." She did not even try Bzdelik Prime.

jaybate 10 years, 4 months ago

Friday without Hope for Seeing a KU Basketball Game on TV this Weekend and so Dealing with it All Through the Artifice of Primes (continued):

} Rick Barnes Prime promises a new look defense this season: UT-Austin players will wear black Stetdad Cowboy hats on the floor during games. Barnes Prime intends for the hats to distract referees from the fact that his players are also going to be wearing brass knuckles this season.

} In a surprise announcement, Fizzou's Mike Anderson Prime has announced that MU will be playing slow-down basketball this season, because The Antlers have been so revolting that he could not recruit any more quality athletes to Columbia.

} Finally, Al Pacino Prime look alike, Vincent "The Thespian" Pescarino, has been signed to play in "The John Calimari Story," a new sports bio pic scripted by none other than the hot young author/screenwriter claimed to be the next Mario Puzo Prime, Sonny "The Bardino" Shakaspeari. A director touted as being the next Quentin Tarantino Prime, one Sean "The Lens" Ferantino, is being courted to direct. A new knock-off competitor for Il Commendatore Enzo Ferrari Prime's legendary sports cars, one Il Tenente Ferrara Sports Cars of Bolgna, Contucky, has reportedly agreed to supply the cars driven by the Contucky Styledcat players. Clothing will be provided by none other than Armani Prime knock-off designer Arpeggio Vermani of Louisville Prime. To save even more money, the thrice-bankrupted production company Concrete Sneaker Productiones, of Neapolito, Contucky, has decided to emulate the late Sergio Leone Prime's old Spaghetti Western formula and film entirely on location in central Spain, where, as the Castillian's say, the weather can best be described as, "nueve meses de invierno y tres meses de infierno," or "nine months of winter and three months of hell." Hollywood film critic Anthony "The Pen" Roselli reports in Hollywood Confidentiali that it will all be "very, very classy, capice?" The great Hank Luisetti Prime's estate, a man who by introducing the jump shot to the game probably did as much as any other individual for the game, and so many other fine and respected Italian Americans offered participations in the production, have declined to participate on grounds that they not only play by the letter of the rules, but by the spirit of them also.

Usual Disclaimer: Not one thing above is factual (it is all fiction), and all of it is intended to be taken as comedy. There is also an expressed absence of malice. :-)

JayDocMD 10 years, 4 months ago

As usual, I enjoyed your musings jaybate. I'm just sorry that you have to post a disclaimer at the end, although I totally understand. Its just a matter of time before some frustrated and browbeaten bucktoothed hillbilly from Columbia, Manhattan or Lexington runs out of rebuttals (and vocabulary) and attempts to supplement their disability paycheck by hiring an out-of-state attorney from an actual university to represent them in a lawsuit for emotional distress.

JayDocMD 10 years, 4 months ago

(come to think of it.. please attach the following to my 2:31 post above)

"Not one thing above is factual (it is all fiction), and all of it is intended to be taken as comedy. There is also an expressed absence of malice."

Tony Bandle 10 years, 4 months ago

dynomite..GREAT LINK!!!LOL

Coach Cal's "self help book" ought to be retitled ' Help Yourself, @#%$ Everyone Else."!!!

jaybate 10 years, 4 months ago


I try to tell myself it is the price we pay for any rule of law at all.

Some days saying it keeps me going.

Some days it doesn't.

Tony Bandle 10 years, 4 months ago

Also off the subject but it appears Adreain Payne's in home visit with HCBS and Dan the Man went spectacularily. Let's chalk him up as our second 2010 signee with Woolridge.

Let's see that a shooting guard and a center, Harrrison Barnes will be the #3 guard/forward, Knight will take the point...that leaves a power forward.

Any ideas anyone???

Martin Rosenblum 10 years, 4 months ago

jaybate -

How cryptic. Are you in a witness protection program or just on the lam? " current location..."

jaybate 10 years, 4 months ago

I am on the lam from a witness protection program. :-)

FairgroveJayhawk 10 years, 4 months ago

Holy Cow! 4 weeks til Late Night! Could it be true. Can I still count well enough to make sure I'm not wrong. Wow 4 weeks. Sweeeet.

Martin Rosenblum 10 years, 4 months ago

jaybate -

So you're a witness who is unprotected and won't allow himself to be caught? What a rogue bull you are!

jaybate 10 years, 4 months ago


Since joking is often how nasty rumors start on the net, let me put some to rest.

No drugs. jaybate's body is a drug free zone.

No witness protection program. Just wish I could get in a post protection program where people could tolerate my longer posts.

Not on lam. Just wish I were sometimes, when responsibilities won't let up.

Just love KU hoops, barbecue and the US Constitution and Bill of Rights, though not necessarily in that order. :-)

Martin Rosenblum 10 years, 4 months ago

Seems we've touched a nerve.

Let's just enjoy.

I think the Beatles said it best...."Let it Be"

Aligned 10 years, 4 months ago

Hmmm, 3000 miles is an interesting distance, as there are few inhabitable places that lie on a great circle radius of that approximate number. Actually the only likely place would be Alaska. Some of the more unlikely places would be Greenland or northern South America, e.g. Columbia, Venezuela or Equador. Another seemingly unlikely place would be the Galapagos islands (but maybe not). A cruise ship could certainly be a possibility. The Azores, Hawaiian islands and Iceland are tempting locations, but they're all several hundred miles beyond that distance. Of course, I make the assumption that you’re referring to statute miles, although even using nautical miles would not make enough difference to have a meaningful effect on the above results.

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